Once Upon a Time ...

Once upon a time, the 7SCHWABEN set out together. The first was HERR SCHULZ, the second JACKLI, the third MARLI, the fourth JERGLI, the fifth MICHAL, the sixth HANS, and the seventh VEITLI. All seven had resolved to travel the world, to seek adventures and to accomplish great and heroic deeds. So that they might go forth well-armed and in safety, they decided it would be best to have not many weapons, but a single one – strong and very long. Thus they had a mighty spear made, which all seven held together. At the front walked the boldest and most manly among them, and that had to be HERR SCHULZ. The others followed in order, with VEITLI bringing up the rear.

Now it happened that one day, in the height of summer, after they had walked a long distance and still had some way to go before reaching the village where they intended to stay the night, a large horse beetle – or perhaps a hornet – flew buzzing angrily past a bush near them in a meadow at dusk. HERR SCHULZ was so startled that he nearly dropped the spear, and cold sweat broke out all over his body. “Listen! Listen!” he cried to his companions. “My God, I hear a drum!” JACKLI, who held the spear behind him and caught some strange smell in his nose, said, “Something must surely be going on, for I can taste the powder and smell the fuse!” At these words HERR SCHULZ took to flight and leapt in great haste over a fence. But he landed right on the tines of a rake that had been left there from the haymaking, and the handle struck him hard in the face. “Oh dear! Oh dear!” cried HERR SCHULZ. “Take me prisoner! I surrender! I surrender!” The other six jumped after him one by one and shouted, “If you surrender, then so do I! If you surrender, then so do I!” At last, since no enemy appeared to bind them or lead them away, they realized that they had been deceived. And so that the story should not spread among the people and they should not be mocked and ridiculed, they swore among themselves to keep silent about it as long as none of them should unexpectedly open his mouth. Then they went on their way.

The second danger they encountered could hardly be compared to the first. After several days, their path led them across a fallow field. There, a hare was sitting in the sun, asleep, with its ears stretched upward and its large glassy eyes wide open. At the sight of this terrible and ferocious creature, they were all struck with fear and held counsel as to what might be the least dangerous thing to do. For if they fled, there was reason to fear that the monster would pursue them and devour them all, skin and hair. So they said: “We must fight a great and dangerous battle! Boldly ventured is half won!” All seven grasped the spear—HERR SCHULZ in front and VEITLI behind. HERR SCHULZ wished to hold the spear steady, but VEITLI, who had grown quite brave at the rear, wanted to rush forward and cried: “Thrust on, in the name of all Swabia, or may your strength forever fail ya!” But HANS answered him: “By all the elements, you talk so bold, yet last you chase when danger’s told.” Then MICHAL cried out: “If it’s not him, then by a hair, it surely must be the Devil there!” Next it was JERGLI’s turn, who said: “If not the Devil himself, then maybe His mother—or his stepbrother, surely!” Now MARLI had a clever thought and said to VEITLI: “Go on, VEITLI, go ahead, I’ll stand behind you instead.” But VEITLI would not listen, and JACKLI said: “HERR SCHULZ must lead, that much is clear, for to him alone belongs the honor here.” Then HERR SCHULZ took heart and spoke gravely: “Then onward, bravely, to the fray, for thus are valiant men known, they say.” So they all advanced upon the dragon. HERR SCHULZ crossed himself and called upon God for help, but as all this seemed of no use and he drew ever closer to the enemy, he cried out in great terror: “Hew! Hurle-hew! Hew!” At this the hare awoke, sprang up in fright, and fled swiftly away. When HERR SCHULZ saw the monster fleeing across the field, he cried joyfully: “By thunder, VEITLI, look! Look there! The monster is nothing but a hare!”

The band of Swabians continued in search of adventures and came at last to the Moselle, a mossy, still and deep river, over which there are few bridges, so that one must cross at several places by boat. Since the 7SCHWABEN knew nothing of this, they called out to a man who was working on the far side of the river and asked how they might cross. But because of the distance and their manner of speech, the man did not understand them and called back in his local dialect: “What? What?” When HERR SCHULZ heard this, he thought the man was saying nothing other than: “Wade! Wade through the water!” And since he was the foremost, he set out at once and stepped into the river. Before long, he sank into the mud and the deep, rushing water. His hat, however, was carried by the wind to the opposite bank. A frog hopped onto it and croaked loudly: “What! What! What!” When the other six heard this from across the river, they said: “Our companion HERR SCHULZ is calling to us! If he can wade across, why should we not do the same?” And so they hurriedly leapt into the water together and were drowned—so that a single frog brought the six of them to their deaths, and none of the Swabian band ever returned home again.

The Seven Swabians adapted from the Brothers Grimm